We're Still Here

I have a word for 2022, one I came up with on January 1 to guide my year ahead, but that's not what I'm sharing today. It turns out I also have a feeling for 2022, one I identified today, and I don't know that there's one word that fully describes it. You might suggest hope, positivity, possibility, resilience, gratitude, etc., but none of those are really resonating with me as "the one." Or perhaps they all belong in a kaleidoscope of feeling. The best way I can describe it is the old phrase about making lemonade out of lemons. 

2021 didn't in fact hold all the promise we thought it would. The pandemic didn't end, although I'm grateful for vaccines and masks and people who care. And we survived, didn't we? There's an enormous amount of gratitude wrapped up in three words: "we're still here."

My family visited after Christmas but had to leave earlier than I had anticipated due to work and an impending snow storm. And yet we were able to gather safely and have a wonderful time together. We didn't get to do a lot because of COVID, but we made the most of what we could do.

Daycare was closed for the first two school days of 2022 due to heaps of snow. Gone were my ambitions of starting the New Year on a massively productive note, balancing wellness tasks and household chores with getting ahead on work-related projects and timelines, knocking to-do lists out like a productive powerhouse. Instead, my toddler stayed home and we drank in the beautiful stillness of winter. Seeing his fascination with snow and icicles and snow plows made me remember the thrill of snow days and appreciate the wonder that the world and the weather can instill in us when we let it.

I remember being stuck in heavy traffic with my parents and uncle. Dad kept trying to figure out if we could go down a side street to get out of the gridlock and pointing out which lane he felt was going a tiny fraction faster than the rest. I, the driver, was getting exasperated and finally my uncle, a voice of wisdom in the backseat, said "we're stuck, man." 

Sometimes we're stuck with our circumstances, even if only temporarily. On the bright side, we're still here. And according to Tolkien, "all we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us." Enjoy your lemonade.